101 Ways To Cook Instant Noodles

So like, most of you already know that I live a rather unhealthy lifestyle. Too much Coke, too little water, not enough vegies, too little exercise. Add to that equation a strange affinity for instant noodles, and you've got a recipe for disaster. Yes, instant noodles. Arguably the most unhealthy food on the planet, yet all of us have at one time or another resorted to swallowing down the junk. I have several friends who shudder at the thought of having to eat instant noodles, but mention "Maggi mee" and prepare to see my face light up with delight. Yes, I do seriously enjoy my Maggi mee, which is precisely what I had for lunch today. So anyway, since I'm quite 'known' for my ability to whip up a pretty decent Maggi mee meal, I'm gonna be a really nice person and share some of my cooking techniques with the whole wide world.

I think I hear triSh screaming.

I like the new Maggi mee, you know the Kari Letup version or something like that. It's supposed to be extra pedas, and yes, I do admit that it's a couple of notches tastier than the original curry flavour (the non-explosive one). Most people cook their Maggi mee the traditional way, as in they follow the directions on the back of the packet and measure out the correct amount of water needed. Some people even bring out their stopwatches. When you do this, you'll most obviously end up with the usual soupy noodles.

Like, wow. How fun. Soupy noodles.

I, on the other hand, am a connoiseur. I prefer to vent a little of my creative energy into the preparation of my Maggi mee. First off, I don't even use a lot of water to cook the noodles, so what happens is by the time the noodles are edible, there's really no soup whatsoever. I use 2 sachets of the soup flavouring, and yes, it does get a little salty, but hey, I like it that way. So where am I? Oh yes. Pop in an egg or two, but do what I do, and separate the yolk from the white. This next part is the most important part in producing that perfect Maggi mee: Do NOT cook the yolk. Yeah, that's right. I only cook the white, and I usually leave the yolk sitting comfortably at the bottom of an empty bowl. So you see, now you've got your noodles (not too soggy please, I like it al dente), your soup's all evaporated (what little of it, boiled to nothingness), and your little egg white floating in the pot, looking oh-so-tempting and tasty. Pour the whole mess into aforesaid bowl (remember, the one with the yolk floating at the bottom?), and the 'magic' of the whole thing is that the heat of the compressed noodles against the egg yolk will warm it, and the exterior will solidy, but the innards will be gooey and oozy and just nice. My parents have warned, scolded, and reprimanded me for eating the yolk 'raw' (dangers of salmonella poisoning), but I like to eat them this way. And yes, I usually spend a good couple of minutes in the toilet after one of these Maggi mee-raw egg combinations. Don't say I haven't warned you.

But today I cooked my lunch a little differently. Instead of putting in the entire contents of the 2 sachets of soup flavouring, I only put in 1 and a half, and poured the remaining half over the noodles after I'd transferred them from the pot to the bowl. And I cooked the yolk too. So it's a little more substantial, a little extra to savour. I remember though, a couple of years back, I used to shake some soy sauce over the noodles, which resulted in a dark, salty gravy. Yummy. And one of the reasons I enjoy going to KL is because you can have Maggi mee goreng, mamak-style! Fantastic stuff, really.

Well, I guess I better stop now. Not that I want to, but because I have to. All this talk of Maggi mee and raw salmonella-inflicting eggs is giving me a really bad stomach ache.

Cheers.